Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again, Just Why?

They did it! We got another Mamma Mia movie and it is somehow worse than the first movie. So Mamma Mia! (Groans) Here We Go Again is a movie that came out this year to celebrate the 10th anniversary of the first movie because it was the fifth best movie of that year. They got the original cast to come back to once again do the same stuff they did in the first movie and that’s it. Before we start if you’re a fan of ABBA and Mamma Mia and you haven’t seen this movie yet and you’re intending on seeing it then go and watch it first then come back to read my rant and also don’t look into any promotional material for the film.

Film Title: Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again
Yes I’m Going To Take All The Fun Out Of This Movie

Okay, for those of you that are still here, prepare yourselves for the true wrath of The Blog Complainer as he shows off his claws and tears into the disgusting corporate schlock. This time there is no Anti Troll to save you with positive happy fairy nonsense. You’re trapped in this dark dark place with me. (Maniacally Laughs) You’re mine now! (Oh wait, don’t click off I was just kidding!)

Cash grab: ‘A Cash grab! Isn’t every movie ever made a cash grab you big hipster dumbie!’ Well that’s true because that’s just how the movie business works. The thing is most movies try. All Indie and Oscar bait Movies are in it for awards and to make some art meanwhile blockbuster movies and the casual going movies only want to make money. Again these movies try. If I look back at the movies I’ve seen this year and I notice some effort was put in to achieve some type of goal. For example even though Jurassic World is a terrible movie, its main goal was not to please me but to set-up a potentially much more interesting sequel. Ocean’s 8 was trying to be a fun Girl’s Out Night movie and Avengers: Infinity War just wanted to dominate the box office and hog all the attention for the rest of the year.

Mamma Mia 2’s goal was let’s do the same thing we did 10 years ago and call it a day. This movie is the laziest sequel I’ve seen all year. They don’t do anything new or interesting but redo the same nonsense they did 10 years ago and they know the older gals who saw the first movie will eat it up, guys will just begrudgingly go along with it and the young fresh faces will be curious enough to say ‘So that’s why Mum was acting like a screaming lunatic 10 years ago, I guess I could give it a shot too.’ There is no reason for this movie to exist but to ride off the success of the first movie and nothing else.

dominic-cooper-mamma-mia2
Don’t Be Fooled By Their Innocent Smiles

(MOANS) Here We Go Again: The main plot of this movie is Meryl Streep is dead (Don’t worry if you’ve seen the trailer then you’ve already seen the movie) and Amanda Seyfried is planning a welcome party to her new hotel in her mother’s honour and the problem is no one can make it except Streep’s annoying friends from the last movie. This plot reminds me of every Christmas concert where they use a kid’s group like The Wiggles to sing some songs and entertain the kids while waiting for Santa to show up and then he shows up and you’re supposed to jump up and down with excitement. Mamma Mia 2 is just like that and that’s why it’s so unbelievably boring.

Before the party starts it’s just nothing happening but Amanda Seyfried moaning and cleaning the place up, occasionally singing an ABBA song and talking to the characters who are already at the hotel. Speaking of the characters, they all look old and tired and just want a pay cheque like for example Colin Firth. Every time I saw him he looked like a tired old guy who just didn’t care. The only one who looked like they desperately wanted a few pennies is Cher. I know this because she is doing an Australian and New Zealand tour to tie-in with the movie.

This section of the movie I spent the most time rolling my eyes as they kept going on about how great Meryl Streep was and how special it is to be back together. It’s just pandering and it became obnoxious after a while. Since this part of the movie is so boring and pointless we need another part of the movie to talk about that’s also boring and pointless.

The Pointless Flashback: You remember in the first movie where Amanda Seyfried showed off her mum’s diary? Well now you get the hour long extended version. Lily James plays the younger Meryl Streep and she isn’t the town drunk yet but a young carefree woman wanting to seek adventure and bump into three hot guys along the way. Again its filler because it was perfectly explained in the first movie and the most annoying thing about this flashback is that it’s not even consistent! I went back to make sure but it’s like they read the plot of the first movie and picked what songs from the ABBA Gold album they haven’t used yet without even watching the first movie. The time period is not very clear. It looks like this all took place in modern times just by how everyone was dressed instead of the 70’s where the plot of this movie told me it was set. The movie couldn’t care less how inconsistent everything is in this movie!

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She Looks Pretty Young For A Great Grandmother

Some of the songs they use for the current situation they’re in don’t really link up with what’s going on and the romance between Lily James and the three other guys is so rushed and under-developed that I find it very hard to believe why did she end having a baby with all three of these guys. Another problem is there is potential in there. They set-up that Lily James hates her mother because she is barely around and doesn’t even care about her and another one with her early days of setting up the hotel and being pregnant. These ideas that we don’t see or only see glimpses off would’ve been much more interesting than the inaccurate re-telling of the 10 year old diary. Lastly I can’t figure out who is more annoying – the younger version of Streep’s friends or the older versions of Streep’s friends.

Failure: To the people in Hollywood who want to make a good sequel don’t make a movie like this and I suggest you read my article on the topic for more information. I never thought I would give credit to Mamma Mia but I’m about to give credit to Mamma Mia. Mamma Mia is better than this movie because it was more about the singing and dancing than the plot. This movie really suffers because it’s mostly about the plot, more than the music. This has come to my attention that they know how to get people to see the movie but not how to probably recreate the magic. The story is irrelevant it’s about the music, the carefree happy mood, the fun vibe and with a little bit of heart.

This movie fails as a sequel since it focuses on what the people who fell in love with it in the first place wouldn’t even care about. It relies on your love for the first movie and panders to you with nostalgia and is the worst type of sequel that don’t even know why people loved their product to begin with.

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Do You Do This Before A First Date?

Verdict: I think we all know I thought this movie is terrible so here’s a big fat 2 or 3 out of 10, I don’t care it’s a failure in my opinion and if you made it this far then I highly recommend that you stay far away from this movie because if you don’t I’ll be meeting you all back here in 10 years’ time.

Phew! It’s over now and I can cross that off my list and pick through the other 10 musicals I’ve got to review next. I think this is my most aggressive review yet so sorry that I bashed to death your favourite movie of 2018 or whatever I don’t care it’s just my thoughts. So tell me I’m wrong in the comments and tell me I’m the worst person alive and I should stick to dumb superhero movies and that’s why I skipped Skyscraper, sorry Rock fans. I’ll be back with the Netflix thing I do later this week so stay tuned and I probably put up other stuff later on because I’ve got ideas in my head that I wish pull out.

Until Next Time, I’m The Blog Complainer, Signing Out.

Meryl-Streep-and-Amanda-Seyfried-in-Mamma-Mia-2
Don’t Forget To Hang On To Your Tissues When Some Says The Word ‘Donna.’

A Public Statement from the true hero of the internet.

Hello Your Saviour of All Negativity is Here, The Anti Blog Complainer to tell you his tales of being one of the first people on this planet to see the new Mamma Mia movie. I know, right. You thought I wasn’t going to show up. I’m like Meryl Streep flying down as an angel to be there at the end to be the saving grace of this hate filled review. I’ve been busy this last month doing nothing but camping out at my local cinema to see the new Mamma Mia movie. I’ve been standing out in the cold for 14 days just like Jesus did in the desert back in the 70’s with no internet or junk food. It was like being stuck in the desert for 14 days. But my hopes and spirit kept me going to see the 2nd instalment of my favourite movie of all time.

When it came out on the 19th of July 2018 I rushed in and bought my ticket but then I realised it wasn’t the 19th of July but it’s the 21st because silly me forgot to bring my phone and my money. All I had was my old ABBA outfit from when I was a kid that I put on. So even though I booked months in advance I was escorted to the police station for being quote ‘a public nuance and scaring away customers’. I know right, what a bunch of hypocrites. I’m sorry my fellow ABBA friends I lied. Can you please forgive me I just wanted to impress you lovely beautiful people. I was in police lock-up all-night and now I’m in my home reading that hater’s review. Have you read it yet? He is making all this up just to get your attention. I better get going I’ve just booked 10 MM2 tickets for 10 days to make-up for the days I’ve missed the movie so until next time my friends I’ll be back here at 2am tonight ranting online on how great this movie is. So Ta Ta!

This Was A Public Statement by the Anti Blog Complainer The Cleanser of Negativity on The Internet.

2 thoughts on “Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again, Just Why?

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